Finding Home in Ourselves: A Reflection on Safety, Trust, and Belonging

For much of my life, I searched for home. Not just a house, but a feeling—a deep, unshakable sense of safety, trust, and belonging. I used to believe home was something I would eventually find in the perfect place, in the right circumstances, or in the presence of certain people. But after years of transitions, moves, and personal growth, I’ve come to realize that home is not something we find—it’s something we create within ourselves.

The Illusion of Home as a Place

There was a time when I thought the right home would fix everything. If I could just find the right balance of space and warmth, the right environment, the right surroundings—then I would finally feel at peace. And yet, even in the most beautiful spaces, I sometimes found myself unsettled.

Moving into my current home in Rhode Island, I expected that this would be it—the place where I would finally feel grounded. It had everything I wanted: a peaceful setting, natural light pouring in through skylights, a quiet, wooded backdrop. But despite all of that, I still felt moments of restlessness. There were days when I would look around and wonder, Why don’t I feel fully at home here?

What I realized is that no external place—no matter how perfect—could create a sense of home inside of me if I wasn’t already cultivating it within. The search wasn’t for a house. It was for a deeper sense of safety, trust, and belonging in myself.

Cultivating Inner Safety

True home begins with a feeling of safety—not just physical safety, but emotional and energetic safety within ourselves. I spent years learning that home is not about control over our external circumstances, but about how we show up for ourselves during uncertain times.

For me, this meant recognizing the ways I had built my life around external validation—working hard to be everything for everyone, believing that if I provided enough, supported enough, or structured things just right, I would finally feel secure. But safety isn’t something we can outsource. It’s built from the inside, through the choices we make to trust ourselves, to listen to our needs, and to create spaces—both physical and emotional—that nurture us.

Breathwork, yoga, and mindfulness became more than just practices for me; they became anchors. They reminded me that safety isn’t found in perfection—it’s found in presence. It’s in the moments when I allow myself to be exactly as I am, without needing to prove or perform.

Trusting Ourselves as Home

Trust is another essential pillar of home. So many of us—especially those who have navigated uncertainty, major transitions, or deep personal change—struggle to trust that we are enough. That we can handle what comes next. That we have the wisdom to make decisions aligned with our highest good.

I’ve had to learn that trusting myself isn’t about having all the answers. It’s about believing that no matter what happens, I will show up for myself. That I will honor my needs, advocate for my well-being, and create the kind of life that supports me.

This trust has changed the way I approach everything—including my work in real estate. Helping others find their ideal home is not just about selecting the right property. It’s about guiding people toward a space where they feel supported, at ease, and in alignment with who they are. Because the most fulfilling homes aren’t just the ones that check all the boxes—they’re the ones where we can truly be ourselves.

Belonging: The Final Piece of Home

At its core, home is belonging. And for many of us, belonging has been something we’ve searched for externally—wanting to feel seen, understood, and valued by others. But what I’ve learned is that true belonging starts from within.

Belonging is what happens when we stop waiting for external approval and start embracing ourselves fully. It’s when we release the pressure to fit into someone else’s idea of who we should be and instead lean into the truth of who we are.

For so long, I thought I had to earn my place in the world—through achievement, through service, through proving my worth. But real belonging isn’t something we have to fight for. It’s something we claim the moment we decide to show up for ourselves, as we are.

Home Is Already Within You

Finding home in ourselves means recognizing that we don’t need to wait for the perfect circumstances to feel safe, trusted, or like we belong. These things are available to us now, in the way we care for ourselves, in the way we speak to ourselves, and in the way we create space for our own well-being.

Yes, a physical home can be a sanctuary. But true home—the kind that provides lasting comfort and stability—is the one we carry within us. When we cultivate that sense of home inside, we can step into any place, any new season of life, and know that we are already exactly where we’re meant to be.

Wherever you are on your journey, know this: You are home. You always have been. And you always will be.